I’ll start here: I was a virgin when I married Jeanette. She wasn’t. Given the “purity-ring” idealism I’d been raised with and the resulting expectations about the way life “should happen,” I almost allowed that reality to ruin our dating relationship before we said I do. How many people are in the same boat, struggling with what should be in the face of reality? Are you going to talk about it? Are you going to sweep it under the rug? Are you going to separate in disgust or open yourself up to understanding and forgiveness, and move forward?